Yes, tourist season is fast approaching here on the beach, so as an essential public service, here are 10 quick ways to spot Tourists as they attempt to go fishing:
10. Squid. Tourist just LOVE frozen squid. Big, enormous chunks of it.
9. Wire Leaders. Every Tourist is enamoured with wire leaders. The bigger, the better. Never know when a sharks gonna bite, after all..
8. Snoopy rods. You know the type. A step below the Zebco 202. A healthy pinfish could snap it without breaking a sweat. -OR-
7. 10/0 Marlin Rods. Hey, it’s saltwater- after all, you never know when a 2000 lb. great white might swim by the dock, looking for frozen squid.
6. Giant Hooks. Doesn’t matter if they’re using the Snoopy rod or the marlin rod, all Tourists believe that any hook smaller than 6/0 is just too small. Besides, you can fit a lot more frozen squid onto an 8/0.
5. Weight. 2 ounces? 3 ounces? Nah! Heck, the waters 5 feet deep, with a 1 knot current. Let’s use 5 ounces of lead!
4. Laws. What Laws? For those few Tourists that actually do catch something, it’s common to see them with a few dozen 10″ grouper, and a few 5″ snapper. After all the fish have died in their bucket, they’ll ask, “Are these any good to eat”?
3. Sunburns, crappy tshirts, socks & sandals, and NE accents. ‘Nuff said.
2. Upside down spinning reels. Having trouble getting it to work? Um, yeah, the reel part goes on the bottom. Reely.
1. Frozen Shrimp. Yes, the staple of every Tourist ‘fisherman’. Hook a few through the back on your 6/0 hook, add a half pound of lead, check your wire leader for kinks, add a hunk of frozen squid for good measure, and fling it on out. Good luck, there!